Showing posts with label Couple. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Couple. Show all posts

Do Men and Women Really Eat Differently - and WHY?

Men and women eat many of the same foods, but they bring a different set of taste perceptions, attitudes and eating styles to the table.

Some taste differences are inborn

Women have a more acute sense of smell than men and that translates into a more vivid experience of flavor. (Flavor is actually a combination of tastes - sweet, sour, bitter or salty sensations on the tongue - and a complex mixture of odors.)

A woman will experience a "good" smell as being better than a man will and a "bad" smell as worse; she may even detect some odors that men miss entirely, says Charles J. Wysocki, Ph.D., a neuroscientist at the Monell Chemical Senses Center in Philadelphia. The differences are subtle but may explain why something you think tastes "funny," he thinks is fine.

But the genetics of taste account for only some of the male-female differences.

The mysterious effect of hormones
Women's appetites are influenced by their menstrual cycle. We eat less around the time of ovulation and more just before our period; cravings for sweets peak at that time, too. Less is known about the effect of male hormones on appetite, though men are thought to have a stronger overall preference for sweetness.

Cravings-not for women only
Both men and women have cravings. Women report more cravings than men do, but it's hard to tell if they have more cravings or are just more aware of them, says Marcia Levin Pelehat, Ph.D., an experimental psychologist.

Women tend to crave deserts while men more often yearn for savory foods. But high-fat foods, whether savory or sweet-pizza, nachos, chocolate, doughnuts-are prime choices for both sexes.

Feeding your self-image

When dining with same-sex friends, both men and women eat more - 40 to 50 percent more - than they would dining alone, says Barbara Rolls, Ph.D., the Guthrie Chair in nutrition at Pennsylvania State University. But in mixed company, women tend to eat less than they would if alone.

In a study conducted att he University of Toronto, women ate less with an attractive male companion than they did when they were with other women or a less attractive man. Men are slightly less in the company of women but didn't vary their intake according to the attractiveness of their companion.

In another University of Toronto study, women who reported eating smaller meals were rated as more feminine and more attractive by both women and men than women who ate larger meals. Did the size of a man's meal affect how he was perceived? No.

Patricia Pliner, Ph.D., professor of psychology, who coaunthored the studies, suggests that for women, eating lightly is a way of conveying femininity: "In our culture, that's considered appropriate sex-role behavior. It's a cultural norm, like standing up when they play the national anthem."

Others see it as less neutral. "To be perceived as feminine by having less (though not by doing less) is an across-the-board issue for women, from paychecks to power to weight." says Susan Zigouras, R.D., a psychotherapist and registered dietitian in New York City. "Why should you need to eat less to be OK?"

Subtle differences in the way boys and girls eat begin to emerge as early as age three, says Rolls. As they grow older, girls fall more under the influence of dieting and learn a "feminine" eating style.

Are men happier with their weight?
A male dieter is a relative rarity, but studies conducted by Adam Drewnowski, Ph.D., directorate of the human nutrition program at the University of Michigan School of Public Health in Ann Arbor, have found that a majority of young men are - like women - dissatisfied with their weight. Key difference: Men are almost evenly split between those who want to lose weight and those who want to gain in order to appear more muscular. And men are less likely than women to express their weight concerns at the table. When they want to lose, they rely on vigorous exercise, not cutting back on food.

What makes him overeat? And you?
Some studies suggest that men are most apt to overeat in social situations (a time when many women would eat less). Women eat more in response to stress: under stress, men drink alcohol, says Susan Schiffman, Ph.D., professor of medical psychology at Duke University Medical Center.


He eats more...
She eats more...They both love...
Barbecue potato chips
Snack cakes
Chocolate sandwich cookies
Pie
Corn chips
Tortila chips
Beef jerky
Bagged popcorn
Sausage pizza
Hot dogs
Chili
Turkey
Roast beef
Potpie
Meatballs
Nuts
Eggs
Beer
Yogurt
Dips
Candy
Fruit
Pretzels
Crackers
Cheese puffs
Toaster pastries
Macaroni and cheese
Taco salad
Grilled chicken sandwiches
Diet ice cream
Frozen yogurt
Dried fruit
Cinnamon rolls
Rice cakes
Low-fat cheese
Fat-free cookies
Diet soft drinks
Cream liqueurs
Wine
Wine coolers
Pizza
Cheeseburgers
Ravioli
Salmon
salsa
French fries
Ice cream
Doughnuts
Potato chips
Iced tea

Couples Versus Singles: Who's Better Off?


What's Better About Being in a Couple

1. Knowing that when you wear sexy lingerie, someone besides you will see it.
2. Talking after orgasm.
3. Full-time, in-house back-scratching and neck-rubbing services.
4. Sleeping with someone you trust enough to lose consciousness with.
5. Waking up with someone who wants to hear your dreams.
6. Dreaming big couple-type dreams: marriage, house, babies.

7. Halving your housework, your worries, your rent.
8. Doubling your friends, your CD collection, your income.
9. Arriving home and finding a hot meal waiting for you that wasn't left there by Big Bud's Pizza.
10. The security of knowing what you're going to be doing, and with whom, for as far ahead as you can see.
11. Party postmortems.
12. Watching his face turn joyful when the pregnancy test turns pink.
13. Not having to listen to your parents ask you for the 478th time when you're finally going to meet someone they can feel excited about.
14. Not having to ask
yourself when you're going to meet someone you can feel excited about.
15. Using him as your trusty bed warmer at the end of a really long day.
16. Turning your attention from men to more exciting things.


What's Better About being Single

1. Feeling like your life could be a trendy TV show.
2. Being the total master of your fate - from what you're going to eat for dinner to where you'll put your sofa to how you'll design the rest of your life.

3. Knowing there's someone who'll always listen when you want to talk, someone who's your ally in a cruel worlds: your best friend.
4. Remote- control control.
5. Making enormous changes in your life without feeling selfish or breaking anybody's heart.
6. Dreaming big single-type dreams: the hot job, the big bucks, the great romance.
7. Dressing for attention and relishing every ounce of it.
8. Not having any question about whose career comes first.
9. Sleeping in a flannel nightgown on flowered sheets with a cat, a dog and a pile of old magazine.
10.The thrill of feeling that anything could happen at anytime - and knowing that when it does, you'll be free to leap.
11. Flirting that's as hot as sex.
12. Sex without soul-searching.
13. Soul-searing sex.
14. Renting
Speed on a rainy afternoon and fast-forwarding past the terrorism to the kissing.
15. Having the privacy essential for meditating on such vital issues as who you are and what really makes you happy.
16. Turning your attention from men to more exciting things.

10 Ways to Keep Love Blooming Over Time

Relationships are dynamic… Couples who expect their passion to last forever, or their intimacy to remain unchallenged, are in for a disappointed

The trick is to build a more deeply-rooted love in the face of a host of obstacles. Here are 10 ways to keep love blooming over time:

1) Don’t expect perfection
Expecting perfection is one of the surest ways to doom a love relationship. When we’re caught in the throes of passionate, head-over-heels love, we tend to idealize our loved one. But when that love begins to transform itself into a more stable form, we can suddenly become aware of the many shortcomings in our partner that we had overlooked before.

2) Be flexible
The fine art of compromise is an important part of keeping love alive. People who mistake rigidity (and an insistence on always being right) for strength are usually not people who are well-loved.

3) Don’t substitute love for personal identity
The strongest, most durable relationships are usually those in which two individuals retain and foster their own individuality. Don’t try to engulf your lover; if you let your own identity become subsumed by your relationship, chances are the relationship will be diminished.

4) Pursue personal interests
The love you share with your partner may be a great source of strength, stability and support, but if you allow your personal life to fade away, you lose an important source of vitality and an opportunity to fulfill needs that may not be met in your love relationship.

5) Remember romance
When it comes to romance, it’s usually the little things that count most – calling to say “I Love You”, bringing flowers home unexpectedly, tucking a handwritten love letter in a partner’s suitcase before a business trip.

6) Be sensitive to your partner’s feelings
This is not an admonition for you to become a serious mind reader. Pay attention to what your lover is saying, either in words or in non-verbal communication. Don’t belittle your partner’s feelings just because they’re not the same ones you have or because you don’t understand them.

7) Don’t let anger undermine your interaction
Although it’s possible to prevent some misunderstandings from escalating into anger if you’re able to talk about your feelings openly in a non-accusatory manner, it isn’t always possible to keep anger out of your life. When it occurs, bring it out in the open and search for ways to diffuse it.

Learning to say “I’m sorry” is one of the simplest ways. You can also restore equilibrium to a situation in other ways, without having to give in to your partner unilaterally. When anger distorts the feelings of both of you, you can agree to table the issue until a time when you’re able to discuss it more rationally. (Letting a little time pass is one of the simplest ways of defusing anger.) Or you can turn to others – good friends, professional counselors – for help.

8) Be a considerate sex partner
Most people seem to think good sex is a matter of performance. Actually, good sex is more often a matter of being attuned to your partner’s feelings and preferences. Often, it is as much related to knowing exactly what to do.

Here are three examples of sensitivity to your partner’s sexual needs:
* If your partner is fighting a cold or has had a bad day at the office, this is not a good time to try out your sensual massage oil and the new technique you’ve just read about for improving your orgasmic potential.
* If you are really feeling sexually tense and your partner agrees to a “quickie” to help you out, don’t try to make it into a marathon lovemaking session. That your partner may not need sex in the same way as you at this time is not the sign of a problem.
* Be careful about saying no to sex too often; you run the risk of triggering a sense of rejection that is preventable if you simple make yourself available, even when sex is not top priority on your list for the day.

9) Don’t take your partner for granted
Complacency is one of the deadliest enemies of love. Not paying attention to your partner is certainly one way of taking him for granted, but other subtle forms also exist. Condescension is one of the most insidious attitudes that can undermine love. Neglect – as in forgetting to call your partner when you promised to or showing up an hour and a half late for a dinner date, or generally being unreliable – is also a sign that there is trouble in paradise.

10) Maintaining love doesn’t happen automatically
Many people are astounded to discover that love doesn’t sustain itself effortlessly. In order to make love work, you have to work at loving. This requires time and energy. Unless you give of yourself in love, you’re unlikely to get much in return.

Love – A Work in Progress
Although why we fall in love with each other is often a puzzle, what we can be sure of is that the first of passionate, romantic love don’t burn forever. Over time, passionate love usually evolves into a different, more stable and mature form of relating. This second stage of a love relationship is often called “compassionate” love – which, unfortunately, can sound about as rewarding as an old pair of shoes!

In truth, a new, more deeply-rooted love frequently emerges; one in which passion is replaced by mutuality, enhanced intimacy and a broader repertoire of problems, job issues and other issues - can slowly work to erode a couple's relationship, both sexual and otherwise, unless partners take care to prevent it.

Affair-Proof Your Marriage


Bathe Him
Which man doesn’t like to be pampered? Massage him as you soap him up – you’ll bond in the shower.

Fun Times
Marriage, children, money and chores leave little time for fun. When your husband thinks of you, you want him to think not responsibility and burden, but fun. Make time for and plan fun activities. Try a thrilling new sport together. Go somewhere he’s always wanted to go. Avoid ruts and routine.

Think Praise and Pleasure
Do you complain frequently? Do you and your husband often quarrel? If your answer’s yes, thoughts of you might be associated with pain, not pleasure. For every time you criticize your husband, there should be four instances where you compliment and encourage him. If you make him feel bad about himself, he’ll seek happiness elsewhere. Make him associate you with pleasure. It can be emotional, physical or spiritual pleasure, like praying together or saving the Earth.

Adventure Together
Bad times can be better weathered when you know something wonderful is going to happen. Plan a trip you’ve dreamed about. Collect brochures, start saving.

Listen!
Does he wish you would paint your nails, or stop cleaning so much? Those tiny complaints can mean a lot. Draw him out. Find out what he wants or needs.

Deeper Purpose
Find a mission. Do you want to raise children, help a charity or save the Earth? Get involved in projects that will make your marriage more meaningful.

Doll Up
Face it. How you look does matter. Don’t let yourself go after you’ve nabbed your man.

Also read: Win Him Back From The Other Woman


Win Him Back From The Other Woman

Your man’s been fooling around, but you still want him back. What can you do?

70% of couples stay married despite an affair.
80% of affairs are started by men.

It’s not just him, it’s you too. When your man strays, it’s a symptom of a deeper problem in your marriage and you’re responsible too, says Dr. Emily Brown, marriage Centre in the United States.

Think about what went wrong. “An affair happened because somehow you weren’t taking care of business as a couple. Ask yourself where you got off track with each other,” she advises.

Consumed with rage or reeling from shock, most women don’t realize it’s not just him who needs to change.

Sure-win Tactics
* Be patient – Believe it or not, a good way to win him back is to be tolerant. Show you still care through little acts like preparing his favourite food. Even if he doesn’t feel guilty, it’ll make him remember why you got together in the first place.
* Quit obsessing about the affair – Why did he do that? He’s answered the question 50 times and you’re still asking it. You’re using the obsessive questioning to stay away from your own pain.
* Let him know how much it hurts – Talk about what the pain feels like inside, like ‘I feel my gut is torn up. I’m scared to trust.’ He’s got to listen to that. What if he doesn’t want to listen? Then ask yourself if you really want him back.
* Focus on yourself – Men are strange – the more you seem in control, the more desirable you are to him. Says Dr Brown: “The betrayed spouse may be so distraught that she’ll do anything to keep him and he may find that very unattractive. If she gets real and takes better care of herself, insists on being treated decently, that may make him take notice.”

The biggest fights are over:
1. Money
2. Bad habits
3. Parenting styles
4. Intimacy problems

Road To Recovery
From the minute they discover the affair, most women go from shock to anger and then to obsessive anger (“I want to know all the details” phase).

And not many move on. A lot people get stuck in the obsessive anger stage. Things just get uglier and uglier and then they do the same thing all over again in the next relationship. You need to calm down, understand your emotions and talk about the pain. This is where professional advice can help.

The affair wouldn’t have occurred if they knew how to prevent it. Since they didn’t know how to prevent it, they are not going to know how to heal from it without some help. Best friends are not a good idea because they’ll take sides, she recommends.

If you’re able to move beyond your obsessive anger, then there’s a real chance of your marriage surviving. That’s a real turning point when they can start talking to each other about the affair.

But there’s no quick fix to a broken marriage. For the marriage to work, both must put in hard work to rebuild the foundation. This means getting underneath the surface to fix the real bugs in your relationship. The real affair’s not the issue. It’s a symptom. And it’s going to take time. Post affair, most marriages take one to two years to get back on track.

Also read: Affair-Proof Your Marriage

9 Secret About Your Man – He May not Know Himself!

Wondering why your hubby can’t let go of the remote control? Researches have surprisingly answers..

Researches have discovered subtle differences between men and women, caused by evolution needs.

“We sometimes expects men to act like us, then feel angry when they don’t,” says marriage counselor Joy Lundberg. “But once you understand why men do things, your man will seem less mystifying.” Here are nine secrets about him to help you get along better:

1) Men like talking side-by-side, not face-to-face
That’s why he often looks at something else when you’re looking right at him, Lundberg explains. “Women like to look at people they’re talking to, but it makes men nervous.” So to chat with your man, talk when you’re on a walk or in the car, advises brain and personality expert, Dr. Pierce J Howard.

2) His thumb is 20 times stronger
That’s because men spent thousands of years wielding weapons. So, now you know why your husband is so skilled at using – and hogging – the remote control!

3) Men speak about 12,000 words a day, women speak 25,000
The part of the brain that connects the right hemisphere (controls feeling) with the left (controls language) is 40 percent smaller in men. It’s like dial-up versus broadband internet.

4) Men take longer to get the words out
Because of the smaller “highway” between their right and left brains, it can take men 40 percent longer to formulate their thoughts. So, Lundberg suggests that you let your husband finish speaking first. “That way, he’ll become much more talkative!” she says.

5) Men are warmer
Sure, he is being chivalrous when he offers you his jacket when you’re cold. But, he may not be making that big a sacrifice. Men burn calories faster and feel warmer. So that’s why he turns the air-con up while you huddle under the duvet!

6) Men have trouble saying “I’m sorry”
Studies show that this is due to higher testosterone levels and cultural conditioning, says Dr Howard. But a new study says a man who’s sorry about something will avoid your eyes – a sign he knows he was wrong. So, your hubby may be apologizing in his own way, Lundberg points out.

7) Men move on quickly
Men are quicker to rebound from emotional upsets. As Dr Howard says, “Males must quickly forget scary encounters with bears so they can go out to hunt dinner. But a female protecting young needs a long memory about the bears.”

8) Men have a one-track mind
Unlike women, whose dual-brained approach makes us suited to the multi-tasking that’s an essential part of caring for kids, men are mentally geared to focus on just one task at a time.

9) He needs his space!
Men need more elbow room than women do for emotional comfort. So, when your husband sits in the chair across the room, not on the sofa with you. He’s not being unfriendly. It’s just natural!

Massage Your Way to Great Sex


9 bedroom massage techniques that can ignite the fire in your man

Cat Stroking
Position yourself at your partner’s side near his buttocks or sit astride him. Place your left palm at the base of his neck and stroke down his back slowly and gently. As your left hand reaches his buttocks, lift off and repeat with the other hand.

Buttock Knuckling
Place your loose fists, knuckles down on his buttocks and vibrate gently. Make sure you move your fists over his entire buttocks. This technique disperses toxins and ensures all sexual arousal points have been massaged.

Buttock Kneading
Using light pressure, continue to make small circular movements with your thumbs from the crease of the buttocks in a straight line up to his lower back.

Buttock Plucking
Place both palms on his buttocks. Gently grab small section of his flesh between your thumbs and fingers and let them slip through your hands.

Feather Touching
Using the lightest touch, slowly trail your fingertips, in overlapping motion, down the highly sensitive skin on the underside of his arms, inner thighs and the back of his neck. Then, simultaneously stroke your fingers down the back of his neck in overlapping motions.

Whisper Caressing
Soft caressing is profoundly relaxing, especially on the face and jaw. Proceed to tenderly stroke the left side of his face simultaneously with your hands, followed by his right side.

Brow Soothing
Place each thumb on the start of both his eyebrows. Using gentle but firm pressure, glide your thumbs outwards and press down for five seconds at intermittent points along each brow until you reach the tips.

Ear Smoothing
With your thumbs and index fingers holding his ear, massage all over in a circular fashion slowly and firmly. Move on to his earlobes and gently pull them downwards.

Head Stroking
Stroke the hair and massage the head to induce calmness. To end your routine, rake your fingers through his hair, then with your fingertips, gently massage the scalp in circular motions.

before you begin…
Take note of these 10 essential preparation steps

* Give yourself plenty of time, so allocate the least two hours.
* Unplug everything that could distract you, such as handphones and clocks. If you have kids, send them to a friend or relative’s place.
* To prevent other interruptions, lock the door and place a ‘Do not disturb’ sign on it.
* Set the stage for romance with soft music. Put a couple of CDs into the changes so you don’t have to stop and put on a new one.
* Illuminate the room with sensual lighting, such as candles. Turn off glaring overhead lights and drape sheer fabrics over floor lamps.
* Prepare a cup of water or herbal drink for quick hydration.
* Use rolled towels as his neck and knee pillows.
* Take a long hot shower or bath together.
* Burn suitable essential oils in an aromatherapy burner.
* Since massage oils stain most fabrics, spread an old (but clean) flat sheet over your bed or massage surface.

Create Your Own Scent of Love
To create your very own aromatic massage oil, you need to use a scent-free base oil, such as sweet almond, coconut or olive oil. Add to the base oil a few drops of essential oils of jasmine, rose, geranium, rosewood, sandalwood or ylang ylang, which all possess a warming and enveloping quality. To add a note of spice or a stimulating edge to your blend, add either black pepper or frankincense essential oil.

By Yanni Tan