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This privacy policy adapted from blogsthatfollow.com

Updated 27 March 2009

Calm Down, Shed Pounds

If your belly is getting bigger, anxiety may be to blame. Research suggests that during times of high stress, the body deposits fat into the abdominal area. That harried and hurried state also increases levels of cortisol, a chemical that can spur emotional eating. Worse, rampant stress can wreak havoc on your sleep, which may cause weight gain. Researchers from Columbia University Medical Center found that people who got five hours of shut-eye a night were 60 percent more likely to be obese than those who slept seven hours. Those who snoozed for six hours were still 27 percent more likely to have weight problems. "You can't erase all the stress in your life, but you can feel calmer overall by learning how to produce a relaxation response whenever you get riled up," says therapist Elizabeth Scott, M.S., who provides stress management advice at About.com. Here, her tips:

> Breathe S-L-O-W-L-Y
It is physiologically impossible not to calm down when you do this, because it lowers your heart rate.

> Tense Up, Loosen Up
Tighten every part of your body, then relax each muscle group, starting with your head and working down to your feet. This stress-relief technique also helps focus your attention (so you stop racing from thought to thought).

> Tune In & Tune Out
A 2007 study from the University of Louisville School of Medicine showed that listening to soothing music can help lower stress levels.

> Grab A Pen & PAPER
Studies show that people better understand and learn from their emotions when they write about them. You can also phone a pal: "Your emotions and communication skills are ruled by different sides of the brain," explains Scott." When you talk, you get both hemispheres of your brain working together to process whatever's upsetting you."

> Stay In The Moment
Do anything you can to quiet that incessant inner voice. (How will I get everything done tomorrow? Did I pay all the bills this month? Will we be able to afford those car repairs? Immerse yourself in a relaxing activity, such as baking, gardening, or walking, and think of nothing but the sensations surrounding what you're doing at that moment. The more you focus, the less likely your mind will wander into its worry zone.

4 Foods - Eat to Lose

EGGS

Start your morning with them, and you'll curb cravings for the rest of the day. Researchers from Wayne State University studied 30 overweight women, feeding them a breakfast with eggs, toast, and jelly one day, and, two weeks later, a bagel with cream cheese and yogurt (both meals had similar calorie counts). When the women had the protein-packed eggs instead of the bagel breakfast, they are 164 fewer calories at lunch and around 400 fewer calories over a 24-hour period. Cut that many calories a day, and it could add up to a 41-pound loss in a year.


LOW-FAT DAIRY

Try to have at least three servings daily. A study from the University of Tennessee showed that dieters on a six-month program who followed a high-dairy meal plan lost nearly twice as much weight (around 24 pounds) as their nondairy-eating peers, and they shed more abdominal fat too. The researchers suspect that dairy activates fat-burning mechanisms.


HIGH-FIBER FOODS

Beans, lentils, veggies, and whole-grain cereals and breads take longer to digest and thus keep you satisfied longer. What's more, researchers at the Harvard School of Public Health analyzed various studies and found that participants who ate whole-grain foods had lower insulin levels. Translation: They were less likely to have constant cravings, says Mary Ellen Camire, Ph.D., professor of nutrition at the University of Maine. "It also takes longer to chew and eat these foods, which is important because it gives your body time to register signals of fullness."


FISH

It's the most filling protein - even more so than beef! A Swedish study showed that participants who are salmon for lunch consumed 11 percent fewer calories at dinner than those who ate beef for their midday meal (both dishes had the same number of calories).

The Art of Wellness

The mind is an extraordinary tool and when disciplined it makes an excellent servant

What does it mean to be truly well? Certainly, both in mind and body and we all know that there is more to being well. This is often forgotten in these times of fast food, comfort, convenience and the soundbite. That which is forgotten can be remembered and it is this aspect that can profoundly yet easily instill a fuller sense of wellness in us.

Well being is about wholeness, balance and harmony and it is apparent on many levels. It is becoming obvious that our physical state of health is linked with the mental, emotional and spiritual aspects of our being. To be truly well, all facets of our being must be included. Everything in life, people, situations, circumstances are instrumental in serving and guiding us to our natural state of well being, which is our birthright. Surprisingly, sickness is not necessarily excluded as it can point the way to wellness. A flu or cold after a binge or late nights in the office may be a sign to slow down. Challenging circumstances may lead one person to prevail, another to go under or another to profound personal discovery.

The way we respond to the situations life presents us is a measure of our well being.

Choosing A Lifestyle
Great traditional such as Traditional Chinese Medicine and Ayurveda offer comprehensive and clear instructions for the attainment and maintenance of health and well being by including each level of being from the ground up; body, mind, emotion and spirit. Many practices demand stringent adherence to rules and this is fine if they can be achieved. However setting impossible goals or trying to adhere to disciplines that are too strict will create unhappiness when we predictably fail to live up to them. Rigidity in anything can affect each level of being often with negative results, as by its nature, our being is flexible. Whatever you choose to do should be seamlessly integrated into your life. Some important questions to ask are; do I enjoy this or does this inspire me? Can i do this regularly? Is the location convenient? If you answered no to any of these questions then the chances are that you won't be doing the activity for very long, or if you do, you may soon be unwell.

Body
Nearly all diets encourage eating fish or lean meat with fresh, chemical-free vegetables and fruit with legumes or nuts. What we eat affects our emotions and mental health. We can be sure that whatever we do for our general physical health will ripple through every level of being. For example excessive sugar can affect the body's ability to regulate blood sugar, producing symptoms such as mental disorientation and panic attacks. Whatever dietary principles you follow, moderation is the key, so if you must eat sugar or any other potentially harmful substance, keep it moderate and avoid being rigid.

Exercise
Exercise affects the body, emotions and mental function. All exercise releases pleasurable brain chemicals known as endorphins, which make us happy and positive. Our body is strengthened and detoxifield, though too much exercise can be addictive and may lead to strain or even permanent damage. Be it swimming, walking, aerobics, dancing, pumping, Tai Chi, Yoga or Pilates - whatever your choice, use moderation. Do one or two types of exercise to avoid repetitive strain, and to strengthen and stretch different muscle groups and develop various coordinative functions. And remember to get a good night's sleep after all that effort.

Mind and Emotions
Being conscious of our emotions is an important aspect of wellbeing. The saying 'Know thyself' partly refers to recognising our emotions and developing the maturity and power to deal with these feelings in a constructive way. Meditation is a powerful tool for accessing the subconscious emotional programmes. These intense responses can wreak havoc in our lives. Meditation helps us realise that we are not our emotions, yet they are part of our humanness and are important for our well being.

Mind and emotion are inextricably linked. When we work with our emotions we are also using our mind and vice versa. The mind is an extraordinary tool and when disciplined it makes an excellent servant. Meditation, martial arts, and yoga use some of the finest techniques for cultivating a quiet and focused mind that serves the greater good of the individual.

Spirit
And finally spirit. Spirit cannot be separated from other levels, because ultimately all is spirit and spirit infuses all that we do. The more consciousness there is in our life the more evident spirit is and the more well we are.

Ultimately well being is about dwelling consciously in spirit, being free of suffering, be it from emotional bondage, ill health or a worried, fearful mind.

By Lina Lotto

Kiwi Wonder

The kiwifruit, once considered an exotic specialty has now become an immensely popular fruit during the past two decades, and deservedly so. This velvety bright green wonder sprinkled with a ring of tiny, edible black seeds not only blends well with other fruit and makes a striking garnish, it is nutritious on its own.

It is higher in vitamin C than most fruit including the orange and the grapefruit, higher in fibre and has a decent source of potassium that packs in more than an average-sized banana. Scientific studies in Northern and Central Italy with 6- and 7-year-old children found that children who consumed more kiwis are less likely to have respiratory related health problems including wheezing, shortness of breath or night coughing. The antioxidant protective properties of the fruit provide them a sort of healing power.

It has been shown that it is helpful in reducing the intensity of conditions such as osteoarthritis, rheumatoid arthritis, asthma, prevents colon cancer, atherosclerosis and diabetic heart disease. Other benefits of the kiwifruit would be the enzyme, actinidin, that assists in digestion. A good source of vitamin E and A which provides protection on all fronts, boosting the immune system, blood pressure and the heart.

The weight conscious will be glad to know that the kiwifruit contains less than one gram of fat per serving yet it has almost as much dietary fibre as one cup of bran flakes. Take one every day that easy way - slice and scoop, peel and munch, or slice and add to all sorts of food. So get out there and get those kiwis in your kitchen.

A few quick serving ideas of the kiwifruit:


> Peel with a knife and slice the fruit or cut the fruit in half and scoop it with a spoon to eat.

> Add kiwifruit to salads or to your chutney for a little change.

> Serve sliced kiwifruit, strawberries and other complementary fruit, and top it off with yoghurt. You can add muesli for an added zing.

> Blend kiwi with milk and yoghurt for a yummy smoothie.

A Perfect 10 Ingredients

Here's how to really make the most of your shopping - with storage tips, these 10 ingredients will go all the way

Red Onions Choose those that are firm with no signs of dampness. Store in cool, dry, dark place for up to 1 month.
	Instant Polenta Originating from northern Italy, polenta is made from ground cornmeal. Once opened, store in an airtight container and use by the expiry date.
Baby Spinach Keep, unwashed, in a sealed plastic bag in the fridge. Baby spinach is best used within 2 days.
	Veal Leg Steaks Veal is extremely lean and very tender with a mild flavour. Veal leg steaks are thin boneless slices that are sometimes pounded to make them even thinner. Transfer the steaks to a ceramic dish, cover with foil and keep in the fridge for up 2 days.
Small Salted Capers Small capers are milder than large capers. Rinse before using to remove excess salt. Once opened, keep in the fridge and use by the expire date.
	Parmesan Parmesan is a hard, dry cheese with a rich and sharp flavour. Parmigiano Reggiano is the original and best-quality type of parmesan. Freshly grated parmesan tastes better thant he pre-grated parmesan. It is available from supermarkets. Wrap in foil or baking paper and keep in the fridge for up to 4 months.
Lemons Choose those that are bright yellow and feel heavy. Green lemons will not continue to ripen once picked. Store in a cool place out of direct sunlight for up to 1 week or in the crisper section of the fridge for up to 3 weeks.
	Fennel Choose bulbs with fresh green tops - avoid leaves that are brown or limp. Keep, unwashed, in a sealed plastic bag in the crisper section of your fridge for up to 1 week.
Canned Diced Tomatoes This versatile pantry staple can be used in sauces, soups, casseroles, pasta sauces and many more dishes. If you're not using the whole can, leftover tomaties can be kept in an airtight container in the fridge for up to 4 days.
	Sage Look for young, small, green leaves, which have a milder flavour than older, large, grey leaves. Store in a sealed plastic bag in the fridge for up to 3 days.

Creating a Domestic God

Getting men to help with housework and the kids is not only a battle of the sexes, it's a battle of wills. Before things reach boiling point, try employing these tactics to help bring out the domestic god in your husband.

1) Roster Him On
Before you begin "the chat", pick your time and place. Try talking on neutral ground, rather than in a kitchen laden with dirty dishes, and at a time when you are both calm and in a positive mood, says US psychologist Dr Joshua Coleman, the author of the Lazy Husband: How To Get To Do More Parenting And Housework. "Raise the topic with your partner and ask if it is a good time. If he says no - which he has a right to - ask when in the next week would be a good time." says Dr Coleman.

Say you'd like to talk briefly about the division of labour in the house. And try not to criticise. Dr Coleman suggests opening with: "I really appreciate that you're [positive trait]. I'm wondering if we could brainstorm a way to share more of the housework because I've been feeling really exhausted lately."

The trick is to be flexible and open to his input. When it comes to rostering, it's best to get him to commit to doing as much as possible because it's likely there will be some slippage on this part over time. Sit down together and write a list of all of the things each of you do. In black and white, your list will almost certainly be longer.

Ask him which tasks he'd be willing to take on. Try to keep it playful, positive and upbeat. Then thank him for taking the time to talk about it - you shouldn't have to, but it works better if you do.

Once a roster is in place, try to hold quick weekly meetings about how things are going and what needs to be done to prevent resentment building up.

2) Adjust Your Standards
Monitoring and criticising the quality of this housework, redoing tasks, or refusing his offers of help are sure-fire ways to prevent him from even attempting to pitch in.

Many women feel guilty if they're not being superwives. As a result, they might have a harder time giving clear messages. They get their partners to agree to do something and then do it for him before he has a chance to do it himself. Women are generally more houseproud than men. Don't assume your standards are the right ones for both of you.

3) Let Dad Be Dad
Of course it feels like you're the expert in child-rearing - you've done it more intensively than he has. But you're more likely to gain aco-pilot in uniform-ironing and hair-plaiting if you lose your "expert" cap.

This is especially important when couples first become parents. Give him time alone with the children (without instruction). Men who get involved in parenting in the beginning stay much more involved with the kids and the housework.

Men don't always parent in the same way as women. They often encourage more risk-taking behavior, don't respond as quickly to children's distress and are often more strict. Try to see these as differences, rather than rights or wrongs. The more your husband feels valued as a parent and respected by you, the more involved he'll want to be.

4) Work On Your Relationship
This is the fun part, one that will make you happy in a way a spotless kitchen never can. Work harder at becoming closer to your partner, and watch the knock-on effects flow. Men do much more parenting and housework when they feel close to their parners. Give voice to what you like, love, admire or value in him.

Once way to nurture a united front regarding the housework is to do some together. Why not alternate changing the bedding your way with his. And if he's not home at scheduled sheet-changing time, it won't hurt to leave them unchanged until he is.

5) Offer Praise
When your recalcitrant partner starts falling into line, say things such as, "I really appreciate you emptying the bin without me reminding you - that meant a lot to me."

The happiest marriages are those in which men participate equally in child-rearing and household tasks. So if all else fails, mention the research of Dr John Gottman at the University of Washington - it shows husbands who help more with household tasks enjoy a better sex life with their wives.

perhaps that statistic is all you need to swing him into mop-wielding, dish-cleaning and nappy-changing action.

The (new) Rules
If your new housework arrangements are taking a little while to kick in, consider a new approach.

"It is more effective to have a sense of humour and not to go in with all guns blazing"

"Say something like, 'Hmm, you said you were going to do the laundry and it's not done. What's the plan?."

"Get him to re-commit. If he says he will and still hasn't done it in a few days, revisit the matter - this time a little more firmly. Say 'So. the laundry still ins't done. I know you don't like nagging but you're putting me in a tough position here. if I don't nag, it doesn't get done. If I do nag, we're both unhappy. What's the solution?'

"Put it on him to give a solution. Then assume this will take time to work out. And don't become discouraged if it doesn't fall into place quickly."

By Karen Heinrich

Are You A Flirt Or A Tease?

Learn how to strike the right balance

1) You're finally introduce to the sexy new colleague. You:

• a. smile and ask him how he likes this city so far.
• b. touch his arm and whisper your name in his ear.
• c. day "hi" and quickly look away; you're too nervous to talk.

2) You're at a party, and there's no place left to sit. When a cute guy you don't know offers to share his chair, you:

• a. say "I'd love to", and jump on his lap.
• b. tell him you'd rather stand.
• c. accept and try to stay on your half of the seat.

3) Your friend calls while you're getting ready for a first date. You:

• a. ask her how to get rid of the awful butterflies in your stomach.
• b. brag that you'll have him wrapped around your finger by the end of the night.
• c. tell her that you're nervous but excited - you can't wait to get to know him better.

4) When you go out dancing you usually wear:

• a. jeans and a T-shirt.
• b. something low-cut, short and tight.
• c. leggings with flats and a comfortable top.

5) When a guy you don't fancy asks you out, you respond:

• a. "um... sorry, I'm... umm, busy."
• b. "No thanks, but I'm flattered that you asked.
• c. "What time should I be ready?" Seeing you on a date will make all the other guys even more interested in you.

6) You go to a basketball game and find you sitting directly behind a guy you've been dying to get to know better. You:

• a. offer him the rest of your popcorn.
• b. hope he turns around and notices you.
• c. give him a back rub during half-time and giggle hysterically at all his jokes.

7) When you go to the gym - where you know there are going to be alot of guys working out - you wear:

• a. running pants with a T-shirt.
• b. lots of makeup and skimpy leotard.
• c. an old pair of sweats. You don't want anyone to notice you, least of all a guy.

8) When you pull up to your house after a first date that you definitely don't want to lead to a second, you:

• a. say thanks and shake your date's hand - he'll get the message.
• b. jump out of the car before he has a chance to put it in park.
• c. kiss him on the cheek and say: "I had a great time." It's nice to have guys lusting after you.

9) Your boyfriend drops you off at home, and you find a shirtless hunk paving the porch. You:

• a. offer him a cold drink.
• b. put on a skimpy outfit, offer him some suntan lotion and hang out on the porch talking to him.
• c. quickly run and hide in your room.

10) As you're leaving a party where you met a great guy, you:

• a. quickly say goodbye.
• b. make sure he sees you hug every guy in the room before you lean up against him and kiss him goodnight.
• c. tell him you hope to see you again.

SCORING
1. a) 2 b) 3 c) 1
2. a) 3 b) 1 c) 2
3. a) 1 b) 3 c) 2
4. a) 1 b) 3 c) 2
5. a) 1 b) 2 c) 3
6. a) 2 b) 1 c) 3
7. a) 2 b) 3 c) 1
8. a) 2 b) 1 c) 3
9. a) 2 b) 3 c) 1
10. a) 1 b) 3 c) 2

24-30 Total Tease
You might not realize it, but the signals you're sending out - the things you say or the nonverbal cues, like the way you dress - are likely to be interpreted by a guy as an indication that you want to be intimate with him. "Flirting is fine and healthy as long it's honest, but deliberately, playing games or sending mixed signals is inappropriate," says Dr Joseph Rogers, a professor of psychology at the University of Oklahoma. You may like the attention but viewing every guy as a potential conquest can only lead to trouble.

17-23 Harmless Flirt
You've mastered the art of flirting - you know how to be friendly without leading guys on. You've learned that flirting can be a great way to get to know guys, but you don't try it with every guy all the time. And when you do flirt, you concentrate on the guy or guys that you're really interested in.

10-16 Flirt Failure
You're more likely to freeze than tease when you find yourself in a social situation with a guy. Whether you're just shy or not interested in getting involved, the signal you're sending out says stay away. It's fine if you don't want to start up an emotional relationship, but you don't have to give guys the cold shoulder either. If you try to be a little bit outgoing, you'll find that guys can make great friends.

Much a Do about To-Do Lists

You have a ton of things to do but just can't handle them. Worse, you've written them down clearly, and yet, you don't seem to have to time to do them. Make your To-Do list do its job.

• Make a list and do just three. Give your brain a break, and jot down all the tasks you have to do instead of making a mental list and struggling to remember what you need to do. If you can't do all on your list in a day, do just three.
• Interruption free. A friend calls, your colleague comes by for a chat, and you find yourself entertaining them, and whine about not getting work done at the end of the day. Stop these interruptions. Start with closing your office door, letting your voicemail field your calls, and get to work on your To-Do list. After completing an item or two, give yourself a break to call someone you need to speak to, or to check your incoming e-mail.
• Don't ignore the important tasks. The hardest tasks, which are also usually high-priority tasks, are always pushed to the last, but they won't disappear. To be sure you're working on your high-priority tasks, when choosing your three tasks each day, pick at least one that is high priority, no matter what its difficulty level. If you can't finish that high-priority task in one day, even working on it for 15-30 minutes each day will ensure you're working towards its completion.
  
• Reward yourself. After you've completed each task, take the time to reward yourself, such as going for a short walk or relaxing with a cup of coffee. Your day will be productive and enjoyable.

The Daily Tasks

Do the little chores around the home today, and you won't have to waste time over the weekend taking care of them.

• Do a load every alternate day. A family generates a lot of laundry. Neglect it for a few days, and it will grow. Wash a load every alternate day, and it will never get out of hand. Do your ironing every other day, and you won't need to iron mountain loads on Sunday.
• Don't leave dirty dishes overnight. It's tempting to head for bed after that wonderful dinner, but if you don't handle the dishes right then, you'll need to scrape off encrusted food when you do get around to washing up.
• Clean your bathroom now. Most people hate to clean bathrooms because they wait until a week or more, then things get yucky. Instead, do a five-minute speed clean on the bathroom every day. When you're done using the shower, immediately spray the walls with shower cleaner. Use pre-moistened disinfectant wipes to quickly wipe the toilet surface and the countertop. Squirt some toilet cleaner in the bowl and swish it around with the toilet brush.
• Dust daily. Too tired to dust the house? Dust a different room each day, and it will feel less of a hassle. If you still feel you are spending too much time dusting a room, it's time to clear out your junk.